Meditation, With a Sprig of Caution

In a previous post, I categorized  meditation into 3 broad types, depending on the purpose: relaxation, healing others (sending energy), or transformation. But, is all meditation safe to practice without a teacher? Is any meditation you do on your own likely to be effective?

First, let’s look at a meditation that is risk-free and effective without the need for much guidance: meditation for relaxation. During this type of meditation, you typically focus on your body to relax and release tension. Gentle breaths and listening to recorded sounds of nature with gentle instructions can help you become more aware of your body – and therefore the tension. Forceful exhalations can push out stagnant energies. It turns out that focused awareness, coupled with deeper breathing, is effective for decompressing from your day, regaining balance, and healing. 

A long time ago, I practiced Vipassanna meditation. In my late teen’s, I took a 10-day vow of silence at a retreat and immersed myself in continuous awareness of bodily sensations, which were always changing. I am not sure that this approach would have led me to transformation, but it taught me to focus and to be present without expectations. I also learned that I am a process in constant flux.

Later, I would supplement relaxation with a conscious intention of gratitude, or even a heartfelt and relaxed smile. Smiling, it turns out, is a very healing practice! I learned this from the Tibetan Buddhists…. Smiling – authentic smiling in the face of  fear or pain – can be very powerful in diffusing the fear and pain. A heart smile has the ability to shift what you identify with….

Let’s now look at meditation when you have the intention to transform – to break free from illusory perception of life and relate to life as it really is. In this case, it is nearly impossible to make progress without guidance. Why is that?

To answer this question, we need to talk about what may happen during meditation for transformation. If you have a profound yearning to know reality at a core level, then that intention will eventually invite the energy of the infinite into your cocoon of limitations. This energy will work to loosen and release anything that is not the true you, while amplifying any imbalances to be balanced. 

As the dust of old and impacted perceptions rises, you are not likely to feel relaxed at all. In fact, you may go through periods of confusion and depression, all the while continuing to release what is not you and evolving your connection to life. You will likely feel stirred up and live in that state for some time, waxing and waning.

As the energy of transformation does its work, you may begin to remember old trauma and become clearly aware of your sense of unworthiness (that almost everyone carries), which can present either as arrogance or as self-deprecation and self-judgement. If you are meditating on your own as all of this dredges up – possibly at a rapid rate – you may fall into even deeper depression and become overwhelmed by what you carry. Some can become too depressed to function and collapse.

If you are getting guidance from a teacher who knows what they are doing, that teacher can help you to safely stabilize and redirect your attention to recognize and let go of anything that is not you. But you must keep reaching out to the teacher. You must engage the support – that is also part of the learning. Then you can learn to safely adjust the pace of release and continue to clear everything that is no longer serving your life.

I do not believe that teachers should be paid for this work – but that is just me. I feel that helping a soul that is burning to birth is just one of those things some people can do without turning it into a business. In this case, you would get much more than you would ever pay for, so the argument that “money is an energy exchange” is full of holes.

Transformation is typically unpleasant – we carry pain, fear, and unresolved emotions – and they will all need to be seen and possibly relived. However, there will also be glimpses of bliss and freedom. Can you stop this process anytime? Maybe…. Once the process begins, you realize that it is not that easy to walk away from it – even if you think you’ve had enough. Now that you know there is more and you can’t unknow that. You can pause, slow down, but probably the seed will remain in you and continue to sprout. 

To let go of the illusory self, you must keep building your strength to keep going. In addition to the meditation practice, you may need to see a counselor, where you can talk freely about your feelings and thoughts that come up so that these can be integrated. You may also need to adjust your diet and fluid intake to include less processed food and nourish you.

As you meditate more and more, you may also gain greater sensitivity to other forces at play in our reality. You may directly “pick up” on the emotions of others, thinking that these are your emotions – which they are not. You may begin to sense the thoughts of others.  You may also attract entities – energies – that you definitely don’t want near or around you. In fact, because many entities are shapeshifters and lie about who they are – it’s generally better to send them away. “But it is an Ascended Master teaching me directly!”

It is highly unusual for Ascended Masters to contact those at the beginning of their spiritual unfolding, and there is a good chance that a presenting entity is not what it claims – that intruder will just add to your confusion. You know you need to stop meditating for awhile when you begin to experience “voices” telling you what to do. 

In extreme cases, some people may feel like they are losing their sanity. Others may begin to feel grandiose – like they are on a divine mission and are receiving direct messages from God. No – the days of prophets are over and souls need no one in the middle! Delusions of grandeur and importance are signs that someone is collapsing and imploding under the weight of their Ego. That is why a teacher is so important to this process. A real teacher.

This cautionary tale of meditation is not new information, and old yogic texts provide plenty of warnings about opening up too much, too soon, and without appropriate guidance.  Although some teachers who claim to teach meditation may have the ability to ignite opening in a practitioner, these teachers rarely have the practical knowledge to stabilize the practitioner when stuff stirs up. Such teachers may even denigrate their student in subtle or overt ways to save face in light of their inabilities – “He (or she) wasn’t ready. This is what happens when one isn’t ready.” Then, the practitioner is left on his or her own to either literally sink or swim. Some, unfortunately, end up with a mental illness diagnosis and become lost. My sense is that there are many souls who live with the belief that they are crazy, but are actually those who opened too fast and needed to be taught how to handle the changes better. Those who are not meant to teach will eventually see their “students” leave, one by one. Only those with deep karmic ties will remain.

The reality is that life is more complex than some idealized progression of evolution, where a student enters on the path of opening with a crystal clear heart and unfolds without any complications. The reality is that most of us have baggage, but may also have intense yearning for true freedom. Of course this will trigger awakening, but of a more messy kind. And someone capable can  step in to help, if asked.

No true teacher would abandon a soul that needs support and will help that soul reset and restabilize – or guide them to someone else who can do this. In fact, we are entering an era of many messy awakenings, and the need for a compassionate response by those who know is now paramount. The need for more awakened souls is great and urgent! We can only light a candle because someone lit  our’s…..

In the earlier stages of my practice, I often wondered why more people were unwilling to want enlightenment – a permanent state of unconditional happiness and a deeper understanding of reality. It’s no secret that most people are not interested in this and want a fulfilled life. Then, I realized that people must have a natural safeguard to protect them from potentially premature and destabilizing experiences.  Such natural safeguards must be honored. After all, transformation is definitely not all there is to life, and it is not necessary for everyone at any given time.

The yearning ones still regularly get tangled up with teachers who can’t handle the more intense changes in a practitioner – and this is just their way. It is necessary to understand that, after the ignition with such a teacher, you may need to find another, more humble,  compassionate, and capable being to guide you the rest of the way. While igniting someone is relatively easy, taking them across the turbulence safely requires much much more evolution.

So, how do you know if a teacher can help you, or if they will vanish or disavow you when they realize their limitations? You may not know. Just know that your life is not necessarily forfeit if you happen to stumble on transformative energy and put your intention out to attract someone to you who will truly help. You will need to walk through fire, of sorts, and maybe that is just your way. So what? It ended up being my way. There is no one way

Transformation is not a formula because our beings are not formulaic. Anyone who marginalizes you for not fitting a mold is either a coward or has not sufficiently matured. So what?

Be confident that your life will unfold in whatever is your way. You will stand strong without a middleman. Remember that if you reach out for support when you feel like you are drowning, you will  receive it – one way or another. Life requires your initiative and intention, and responds – this is the key to living through challenges that venture into the unknown. This unknown is our birth, bithright, rebirth, and truth.

Different Flavors of Meditation

Like ice cream, meditation comes in different flavors – you may be drawn to one, and completely turned off by another. However, on the surface, meditation appears to just be about sitting still. How many different ways can you do that?

Meditation is mostly about attention and intention. The sitting part is really only a way to let the body rest. It is the way you focus your attention and channel your intention that makes all the difference in the approach. You can also do moving meditation, but even that practice is about the deeper processes going on as “you.”

While life looks like a bunch of objects, in reality it is really a collection of dynamic processes. Our lives are ever evolving uniquely for each of us and are more a collecton of relationships than things. 

Many books are wtitten about meditation. However, I see three main types of meditation stand out, and these types have a different intention: relaxation, healing, and transformation. 

Which is the right way? Of course, there is no one right way to live. We are all unique and so are our choices in life. We may not always know how and why we choose, but we all know when something feels right and which intention to set for connecting with life.

Meditation for Relaxation

The world is filled with constant stressors – responsibilities, demands, inflexible schedules, and a lack of space and time to rest. Illness, trauma, and loss add intensity to this mix. It is the rapid pace,  rigid commitments, feeling of lack, fear, and our attitudes toward ourselves that lie at the root of stress. Most people don’t like themselves, and living as someone you don’t like is extremely stessful.

We need time to be quiet and alone, and make that a priority – as essential as sleeping and eating. Our culture is starting to forget what true rest feels like – when we stop doing and start being. But we can set the intention to make time to be without any stimulus.

Meditation for relaxation is about redirecting our attention to the quiet and nurturing parts of life – gentle sounds of nature, the feeling of sunshine, the rustling of a gentle breeze, the sounds of the birds – a break from noise and activity pollution.

There are many CDs on the market that play sounds of nature and guide you through the relaxation and increased awareness of your body. If you have Amazon Prime, you can even get these recordings as part of your membership under the Fitness category.

Setting time aside for yourself is a lifestyle change. It requires you to put your foot down or draw a line in the sand.  Sometimes this change requires a negative shift in your life when you finally accept that overdrive does not work for you. Caring for yourself by resting then becomes a priority and is a key step toward loving the being that you are.

Many practitioners struggle with their thoughts coming up during meditation as a distraction. Sometimes thoughts can be simply observed and allowed to pass by, but during other times they seem too distracting and even disturbing. 

When thoughts don’t just go away, they carry an important message. These thoughts are part of the learning that is taking place while you are resting. Now that you are quiet, these thoughts are telling you about something that is weighing you down, and maybe – rather than being ignored – they need to be attended to. You may want to write them down to consider later, and maybe that will help your body to feel heard. It’s a start.

Another way to study the message of your thoughts is to find them in your body. Although that may sound strange, your intuition can guide you to where a  thought seems to be located in the body – a kind of pressure, tension, or tightness. The body needs to release something and is crying out for your help. What can you do?

You can keep focusing on the body (instead of the thought) and breathe deeply, while holding the intention to let that denseness go. Breathe out the stuck energy – forcefully, even. You may want to move your body to loosen the energy as you keep your attention on the disturbance. In some cases, you may want to talk to someone about what is bothering you with the intention to let it go. Trapped trauma is only going to intensify during meditation unless you have a way of releasing it as it comes up.

Maybe you are angry and sad? Then feel that during meditation – let it work it’s way through your body. Screaming and punching pillows can also help you let go of anger and reset your view of certain situations. Crying without guilt or shame is also a release. Being with pain, rather than running away, is often helpful. Dive right into the discomfort and feel it fully. That takes a lot of courage….

Basically, you need to try different things, explore, and do whatever works for you. This is your work and your time – no one else can do it for you, but some people may help to support you through it. 

Accept the help. Feel the gratitude. Be OK with the fact that someone cares for you and wants to be there for you. Be OK with the fact that you are OK just the way you are. Attend to the signals. Intend to let go of whatever you no longer need. You will then have more energy available for your life’s expression!

Meditation for Healing

Some practice meditation to help themselves and others heal. This kind of practice harnesses energy and delivers it to a recepient or even the planet, if it is karmically allowed. 

One must be very vigilant about who and how to help. We never want to interfere with another soul’s path. That kind of discernment is challenging and many overstep karmic boundaries unintentionally.

Another pitfall of healing work is having the practical knowledge of how to harness and channel energy properly so as not to deplete your life force. This can only be learned from a teacher who knows what they are doing.

Meditation for healing is an entire topic in itself and I may write a separate post about it in the future.

Meditation for Transformation 

Meditation can also become a practice that leads to permanent change in your relationship to the life process. Typically, those who feel disillusioned in life are on the cusp of realizing that they are ready for a teacher. Eventually the yearning for unconditional happiness becomes so intense that a teacher shows up – seemingly out of the blue.

This kind of meditation is very different in intention, which is to expose and unveil the illusions of the Ego – a perception mechanism configured to maintain separation and block union. 

Again, a teacher who knows how to work with the Ego directly is needed to help the practitioner stay on track. Many teachers claim a way to break free from illusion, and yet only a few actually do. But some souls know with their entire being that nothing else will be enough and persevere through the spiritual fire. 

So, here they are – the three types of meditation I’ve observed – in very broad strokes.

If you are interested in a specific topic, have a question, or just need support, feel free to leave me a Comment.

From Mundane to Magical

Life does not have to feel lackluster. When did the magic end for you?

Perhaps there was loss, pain, and anger. Perhaps you realized that regimenting your day made your life “work,” but you paid with your freedom. Perhaps you have seen and felt everything you can imagine. Then, something solid and rigid set in – something that you now call “you.” And that “you” is not someone you love. Without love, magic withers and gives way to the mundane.

It doesn’t have to be this way. The infinite is always knocking on your door, but you make choices to focus on other things. You are free and you can choose to set aside time every day to remember yourself. You can buy a box of crayons and color or draw. You can remember yourself while waiting in line, driving in your car, or sitting on your patio. You can build with Legos. Whatever brings back that curiousity and wonder. 

You can choose to turn your life over to the infinite and become everything you currently seek from somewhere else. It won’t happen overnight, but every gesture builds on the previous. Yearning is never wasted.

Sure, there will be resistance, judgement, and justification. If you can catch these and see these, you know they are not you.

If you could only see yourself the way I see you. There are no words. But you hide from yourself. Could it be that thevsimole practice of meditation is all you need?

There is no one-size-fits-all answer for how to bring your magic back. So you have to take the leap of faith and allow and invite magic back into your life – the kind that begins deep in the heart and knows no separation. The kind that embraces uniqueness and explores, without looking for recipes with pictures and numbered steps.

I know – this is hard. Too much has happened to make us forget. But it’s never too late. Every moment is an opportunity – and the moment knows no time. The moment is indifferent to insecurities and doubt. It is the true magic.

All you have to do in this life is learn to be yourself. You are not your body or your feelings or your thoughts…. So, who are you? Each one has to yearn to know this, and each one needs a different key to unlock the light of the soul. May you rediscover your magic just by putting your attention on it. May you let go of all that you are not… if not in this moment, then in the next…or the next.

Can We Please Stop Spiritual Jargon and Inappropriately Invoking Physics?

If you listen to certain spiritual teachers, like Thich Nat Hanh, the Dalai Lama, Eckhart Tolle, and Pema Chodron, you won’t hear a single word you don’t understand. There are many more examples of such teachers, but I listed only a few. That’s great news because truth is simple and relevant to everyone.  Almost everyone is interested in what life is all about and tries to make sense of it all.

However, the recent opportunities  presented as evolution in human awareness – an all inclusive phenomenon that should exclude absolutely no person or culture  – has produced much jargon. If a person doesn’t know about Ascension, 5th Dimension, Increasing Vibration, Consciousness Shift , they are totally out of the loop. Why this new form of exclusivity? 

I’ve also learned that people define these ideas differently, use them in conversation, and assume everyone means the same thing. This does not make for a clear exchange of ideas. When listening closely, it is clear that few live what they claim to live…. It is a show.

OK, maybe we need a new language to describe our evolution. I agree. But, isn’t it obvious that we still don’t have one?

Furthermore, too many people who don’t know physics claim how quantum mechanics or Einstein fully support what is going on spiritually. Physics explanations of spiritualism sound as if someone took a bunch of physics words and randomly generated a sentence with a subject, action, and object. As a physicist, let me say this:  1st, physicists don’t have a clue what these “spiritual terms” mean in any scientific and measurable (precise) way. 2nd, there is nothing in quantum mechanics or in Einstein’s writing that even vaguely supports what people are talking about. The fact that Michio Kaku writes books about parallel worlds to make money (because people are interested) doesn’t help – he hasn’t done real physics in ages and sold out. “Parallel worlds” and “multiple realities” are particular interpretations of quantum theory, but an interpretation is not a proven, workable fact to support anything. Here’s just one of many examples of invoking physics that is as far from physics as one can get:

Quantum physics has proven that our thoughts create our reality and that everything is energy vibrating at a certain resonance. A dimension is a gathering of a particular resonance, with the edges of that dimension overlapping into the edges of the next dimension.

http://in5d.com/what-does-it-really-mean-to-ascend-to-the-fifth-dimension/

No, there is no conspiracy among the physics community – I witnessed it first-hand, and physics research just doesn’t work like that. No, physicists are not all close-minded – they continuously look for ways to push the envelope of our understanding of nature in a way that follows strict investigation methods – much like detective work. And, no, I am not overusing my mind – I can live as awareness and work to reconcile my direct experience with the more solid, static expressions of this world.

Finally, channelled writing has become as widespread as “found footage” movies. “Dear Ones…”, many begin…. I’ve read my share wondering what the point is – to tell me that I am love? To tell me that the Earth needs to be healed, or that our ability to live on the Earth needs to be healed? To tell me that the human race must be less self-absorbed and more open to possibilities? Isn’t all of this obvious? This is nothing most of us don’t already know. 

Why not live – simply live – and discover day-by-day who we really are? Why do we need some mothership to make life – which is already plenty interesting – interesting? I know about entities that love to piggy-back on the human experience. Why give up our power to anything before we’ve even fully claimed it? Where is the discernment to test the value of what is shared by external sources?

And, what are the sources of these channelled writings? In most cases – who knows which of the gazillion entities with an agenda decides to pipe in….The claims are quite grandiose – archangels, angels, ascended masters, and aliens. An entity can claim to be anything at all! For example, one source claims to be from Orion, which is a constellation of stars that make a pattern in the sky. But these stars are not even close to each other! In fact, most constellations are just projections on the sky, while the actual stars are separated by great distances. “Well, it’s on the other planes of existence- not physical!” OK – so what? What have you learned that you don’t already know? 

Jargon is dazzling. Physics appears to give credibility to spirit, even as many hypocritically shun scientists as close-minded and clueless. Aliens are out of this world. And people, I guess, like dazzling and credible.

But truth is simple. No jargon changes the fact that each of us must listen, learn, discern, and directly experience reality for ourselves – without filters and blinders. We already know this in our hearts. But we continue to seek answers that satisfy the mind, be the center of conversation, and appear evolved to others. How long are we going to keep talking about loving instead of just directly embracing every aspect of our existence – and doing it?

Is there value in developing a modern language to describe spiritual evolution? Yes. Can physics explain our spiritual experience – even in part? Possibly, let’s keep looking. Are some channelled writings able to help us change our lives for the better? Yes. 

When we communicate, we have a choice to be clear, direct, and authentic. We also have a choice to be silent and listen – really listen. We have a choice to live with the questions as a kind of yearning that brings us closer. But that requires a humble heart, internal checks and balances that are always “on,” and the patience to allow and invite happiness directly to live.

I’ll leave you with this….

Timeless Change

Nature – life – does not stand still. Change is the norm, and a light wave calls us to surf toward no shore we’ve ever encountered. Destination is merely the comfort of illusion, and the journey beckons.

In the night sky, at unfathomable scales, there are fantastic objects and processes alive with change. But after we glimpse the stars, we quickly narrow our vision to the situations close to home and look for patterns, cycles, and rhythms that will give us a sense of control over our lives. 

We are wired to want certainty and security, which may explain our myopic vision of life and even the longevity and prosperity of large, established institutions. Well-traveled pathways promise jobs, retirement funds, and to subsidize our health insurance. Ironically, it is these very institutions – egregors –  that strive to thrive at our expense of taking our life energy, and we willingly trade inspired life for a promise no one can really keep.

We seek stability because we have responsibilities and people who rely on us. Doesn’t that make sense? Yes and no. The rapid changes in earth’s climate, available resources, population, and culture are forcing us to re-evaluate our approach. But are we heeding the call? Technology is changing rapidly and the future job market is largely undefined. As robots take over mining and manufacturing, and the U.S. work force is at capacity, the reality of uncertainty is becoming more and more evident. In fact, we are more likely to thrive by practicing flexibility and resilience going forward than hanging on to a tree branch amidst roaring rapids.

Psychologists keep reminding us to teach our children resilience – the coping skills required to bounce back from adverse situations – but they seldom mention flexibility and open-ended living. Such a paradigm shift is quite dramatic and goes well beyond recovery from setbacks. Here, the pursuit of stability is void and supplanted by creative adaptability to any and every situation.

Imagine growing up with the ability to adapt to change in the moment without planning legacies and fearing death. We gain the ability to integrate our experiences in the moment, rather than spending months or years in therapy processing the past. Imagine feeling the moment so deeply that time itself ceases to have meaning, and there is an everpresent sense of opportunity and unconditional delight. Rather than insuring our lives – literally and figuratively, we value the unknown. The term risk gives way to exploration.

It may sound frightening and possibly unrealistic. Yet, I feel that this is the next step in our evolution. The continuation of the human experiment may depend on our willingness to break open our static shell of a universe and enter the dynamic void. And this has already been done by a small number of various well-known and obscure beings – pioneers, who have shown us throughout history that open-ended living is possible and even desirable. After you wake up to just how rich each moment truly is, you also release any holding on to the past and the future.

But how do we get out of the habit to keep solidifying the edges of our cocoon? How do we embrace the state of being where we let go into life, surrender our self-absorption, and immerse fully in the dynamic process of living?

The easiest way to experience timeless change is to observe someone who is already living this way. The new spiritual teachers claim no special gifts and appear no different than anyone else – except that they are at the front lines of life as living examplars of freedom. In their presence, you forget the little self and become saturated with joy and inspiration – even if for a brief while. The role of this new generation of teachers is to show others what is possible and inspire each person’s unique expression of freedom.

The new  teachers will be living gateways to new ways of relating to life and show us how to listen to the undercurrent flow of existence. 

Each person has the ability to be at the right time and in the right place, doing the right thing. But the information we need is still too quiet and subtle to be considered trusted intuitive guidance. The new teacher amplifies the current of life so that it can be heard and accessible to more people – to reach critical mass.

When people say “Focus on the positive”, I often hear the implication that life entitles us to purely positive outcomes. However, life marches on despite our definitions of positive and doom, and operates at levels beyond black-or-white gauges of success. When we don’t find the cycles in nature that suit us, we create our own to achieve short-term effects.

We value competition over cooperation because we strive to be on top of the food chain. We value creativity, but few feel that they have any. The rest feed off of the creative surges of others to get a “fix,” which only lasts until the next craving. There are very few truly novel and creative ideas because creativity requires opening oneself up and suspending all fixation. But, we are now a race of vampires and opportunity-seekers who are blind to our true nature and to life’s flow, feeding off recycled plots and viral social media.

On larger scales, those who seek power are looking to horde life force – but this has been said before.

So, why has so little changed from the feudal times when the few had so much control over the many, and the planet was merely a breadbasket? Why have we allowed these structures to persist despite the evidence that they have ceased to serve the greater good? It is all a natural part of our evolution, and it is time to become aware of the next level – even if it seems dim on the horizon. Yes, simply becoming aware and to start feeling the edges of the next level. 

The moment is timeless change, and our filters are being challenged to experience so much that we are currently missing while living in a loop. All that is needed from us now is to suspend our disbelief that unconditional happiness is living timeless change.

Embracing Differences Vs. Setting Boundaries

We live in an interesting time when previously taboo subjects are discussed in the open, old norms are questioned, and people are actively exploring what is and is not OK. What has been considered “moral” is laying on a chopping block, while the masses pass the butcher knife – fighting over what we can and cannot  embrace.

As a culture, we are engaging in a process to discover what we embrace and what we reject, and it is messy. However, we also explore the same questions on a personal level every day and in the context of our own lives. We are in the thick of learning who we are and who we are not as individuals, communities, and nations. We are not yet cohesive enough to be asking who we are as a planet, but I believe that time will come.

My husband had a great definition for boundaries “Here’s my line. If you don’t cross it, we’re cool.” What is fascinating to me is that “the line” is often blurry and can shift for many of us who are learning to integrate more and more that is being unveiled. The complexity of our world, our struggles to get our basic needs met, who and how we love, even where it is OK for us to go to the bathroom, are swirling around us.

Some call themselves “conservatives,” which they equate to an unwavering moral compass. This approach may work in communities where time was frozen – those who can conform, stay. However, the rest of the world is changing rapidly: people are wrestling with human rights at an escalated pace, thereby pushing for redefinition of what it means to be human and embraced by society.

Does free speech include promoting nationalism and racism? Is carrying a pregnancy to term a righteous requirement, or does a woman have rights over her body and deciding when she is ready to be a parent in a world of controlled resources and limited opportunities? Is it OK for us to claim the land of another people and reduce them to, basically, noncitizens? Is it OK for different religions to coexist in the same towns, cities, and countries without experiencing blatant or more passive harassment? Is it OK for a person to be homosexual, bisexual, asexual, or transgender and be embraced for who they are? What does how women dress have to do with women being raped? Is it OK to continue to pollute and abuse our resources to keep the economy going? Is it OK to test products on animals and trap animals in industrial processes to massproduce food? Many more voices are questioning and rejecting old boundaries, many are caught in the middle and questioning where they stand, and many are quoting scripture at every opportunity to justify positions. Scripture does not discuss the handling of our environment, limited resources, and the trade agreements that require cross-cultural negotiations.

To me, the very fact that we are vocalizing our beliefs, protesting, and asking hard questioning is just natural and normal in every way. We want to make sense of who we are and how we fit into where we are. The changing conditions of our planet express an urgency never as strongly felt (or ignored) as it is now. The changing demographics of countries are triggering those threatened by the change. How far in history should we go to determine which country should preserve which demographics?

Every square inch of the planet – if it has apparent value – is being fought over. Conflicting belief systems are being fought over. To what end?

Well, simply speaking we are the human race sharing one planet and its limited resources. Because we do not really accept this fact, we draw artificial boundaries based on prior conquests, belief systems that have long ago been doctored by human interpretation, the size of nuclear arsenals, and the myriad of agendas – both personal and cultural. In some ways, it is comical how little people question what their humanity means, and what our true responsibility is to one another.

Rather than the black-and-white plot line of good vs. evil, the true battle unfolding appears to be “What does it mean to be human on Earth?” We have not yet answered this question in a satisfactory way. The process of discovery is even more difficult than the more lofty goal of “world peace” – and a prerequisite.

We cannot truly embrace humanity if we reject individuals, and we cannot set collective boundaries until we know who we are both as individuals and members of the human race.

For those who wish to help the planet, it is so important to re-examine their beliefs and value systems. Prejudices lurk deep in the unconscious, and these must be uprooted and the results shared widely across the globe.

Global unity does not need to be about loss of individuality and differences. A celebration of our uniquenesses must occur if we are to truly embrace who we are. 

We are evolving out of Darwinism, which is now holding us back. The “fittest” are nothing more than those who can manipulate others through economic and, therefore, military means. On a large scale, we are still small children on the playground, deciding on the rules of the game. Let’s just call it what it is, and it is not a criticism. A child who is nurtured into finding him or herself, beyond dire circumstances and family histories, does grow up and mature.

Let’s not be hasty to embrace or draw boundaries, but take our time working through the mess. Are these the right problems to consider?

  • “We aim to solve only the most urgent problems without looking at the big picture.” 
  • “We have conscious and unconscious personal agendas, and we don’t reflect on how these influence our lives at various levels.”
  • “We are afraid of life and hide until it is over.”

Embracing and setting boundaries are tightly intertwined processes, and we can no longer cling to others for answers. The onus is increasingly on each of us to be true, and we must pursue that calling with sincerity.

Where Do the Evil Things Go?

For many years, I studied the source of evil. So far, I learned that human energy – emotional, mental, and sexual – eventually funnels itself into semi-aware entities that begin to play. In other words, people create the energetic ego soup in which we take a daily swim. Evil is one of the forms our collective energy can take.

What is evil? At its most fundamental level, I see evil as a lack of connection to life. It can take on forms of brutal and barbarous acts, but these are only the faces of something more fundamental. Evil can also appear very beautiful, powerful, and enticing. At some point, most Lightbearers will be tempted and must reach deep into their being for discernment.

Furthermore, there are entities beyond our dimension that occasionally reach in – I do not know their true purpose because I decided not to empathize with their alien consciousness at this time. One thing that’s clear is that our invisible world is pervasive.

But it doesn’t stop there. Some entities start to move about our planet and cooperate with people’s psyches to attempt use people to exact chaos and darkness. 

Lightbearers have been there as long as history, quietly balancing energies at various scales of existence.

Some Lightbearers do not need to do as much as they need to be. Many Ascended Masters maintain presence on/near the Earth just to keep the darkness at bay and maximize positive shifts at every opportunity to make light more available. Some say that without the presence of these Masters, our world would not last minutes. However, doing is also important because it is impossible to express love fully without grounding it on the planet. Those who are and those who do cooperate and learn from one another. Light-borne action must take place and manifest.

Lightbearers live a humble existence because they are no longer interested in contributing to the ego currents pervading lives. They do not scramble for fame, attention, or affirmation from others. They live, connect to others, and share a fundamental self-love. They don’t need a title, followers, or status. They can organize to work at various levels, on a spectrum of be-ers to do-ers, physical and on other levels. 

Lightbearers are not recruited. Instead, they make a heartfelt commitment early in life and find their teachers as soon as they are ready. One candle lights another, but no two candles are the same. The teacher reveals only a bit at a time because some things must be learned well before others. But the true teacher also knows and honors the student’s needs and potential. What we can be taught is such a small fraction of what we must learn, and we learn in the midst of our own lives. We must walk in the wilderness and encounter all sorts of beings and events to learn who we are, and who we are not. 

Books are helpful in presenting what is possible or reminding us what we already know or giving us new ideas for ways to relate to life. However, books cannot really teach – one must live their life after reading and periodically receive support from a teacher. Otherwise, there is a danger of no learning happening at all – only information gathering.

Lightbearers practice surrender to the infinite – in whatever form that may take. Because no two are the same, how and what we surrender is likely to appear precious only to us. Each letting go allows us to own and reclaim more and more of who we truly are and release the chains of illusion.

But what of all this evil? Are Lightbearers actively fighting evil, or should be? I’ve spent much time trying to grasp this dilemma of how evil is to be handled and treated to allow for increased happiness in our world.

I’ve studied the possibility that there are cosmic battles fought by more evolved beings. However, I believe that the impressions some have shared of actual wars going on in other dimensions are largely human interpretations and cannot be taken at face value. Only a few levels higher than we are, all duality vanishes and war is an impossible concept. War is a lower dimension concept.

I do feel that we must stand tall to the faces of evil – as high as 50 ft. tall. Standing tall and shining – without fear or running – is a powerful act of self-love. We can also act on the physical plane to speak up, protect, and share with those who need help. However, not all who appear helpless are helpless, and we can confront those in due time.

Ultimately, those who are able will trasmute dark energies and recycle them  into light. No swords. No armor. No spells. Just loving transmutation that stands firmly in the truth of who we are. One critic suggested that this kind of approach is “unicorns and rainbows”, and will never work. Well, being love is not a weakness – in fact it is the highest strength. Few can do this, and much work is still required – but that true strength has no choice but to grow. The work we do is the right work when it clarifies boundaries, x-ray visions through bullshit, and lets go into a state that knows no conflict.

 I do not believe that evil must be carried off and dumped somewhere else, like trash. The human race is collectively responsible for shining light into dark corners here and now, at whatever level each is able.

Finally, I hear so many looking toward some more evolved race coming and whisking humanity to a better place, or those who can’t wait to Ascend and basically get out of a painful and confused existence. Ultimately, I feel that this is not going to happen quite that way…. We learn how to transform and transmute life ourselves – otherwise, who are we? 

The work of transmuting darkness to light has been called White Magic. The practice is based on who we are and not so much on talismans and spells. Lifting and dissolving one’s veil of being less than  and helpless is a prerequisite to practicing White Magic. I will go as far as to say that no candles or ceremonies are necessary for an experienced practitioner, and no physical objects or words. At some point, intention is everything and no ceremony is required. But, getting to this point takes time and an extreme willingness to let go (which can feel like dying – possibly many times). Many who will try this will not succeed because of their self-absorption.

The evil things don’t go anywhere – they stay right here, and we serve each other and them by learning to love. We practice – increasingly together and increasingly intensely – to refuse darkness and envelop it in light. But the light must already be there and remain unwavering…. Thus, before going too far, we make sure our candle hardly flickers. Gradually, we can safely take on more and more, as the Earth transforms into a Planet of Light.

A Humble Heart

While going through my evolution, I’ve come to appreciate humility. A humble approach invites deeper understanding and allows for more complete integration of experience and awareness. Of course this may sound obvious, but it is not that easy to remain humble.

Early in my practice, I was far from humble. My teacher would remind me how important it is to be humble because the divine cannot enter a body of arrogance. After transformation, this became all too clear. I was able to see in others how arrogance was a “holding on” and the exact opposite of inviting the infinite into one’s being. 

What was even more interesting is the way arrogance presents as both a brazen overconfidence and a false modesty. Arrogance literally repels love. 

I studied various people with knowledge and power, and saw how many are invested in a particular approach. This investment looked much like an anchor to me, or a Chinese finger trap that tightens even as you try to become free. 

Arrogance episodes are often followed by self-loathing – this dancing duel reinforces the need to prove one’s value – an impossible task. The trap is so custom-tailored to our being that it is very difficult to detect, let alone overcome. 

To understand the role arrogance plays in our evolution, it is necessary to recognize it regularly – until we naturally begin to revel in a humble, open, and receptive approach toward the infinite. The following reflection has helped me:

1. Ask: Am I “happier” when someone appears to be “below me”?

I would wait until I am tired, when the left brain starts to wane, to be honest with myself. Sometimes delighting in the apparent ignorance of others is blatant, but this can eventually become subtle – as the ego gets more clever.

A humble heart celebrates and enjoys.

2. Ask: What is my goal? and then Why? Or, ask: Do I feel unmotivated to get involved in life? Why?  Keep asking Why? 

Some answers may come in the form of pictures, memories, and bodily sensations. Do you have something to prove? Do you feel under the control of some influence? Do you feel like you must run as fast as you can from pain and sadness, or do you feel like if you stopped you will lose your value? 

A humble heart knows its strengths and feels comfortable living with questions, remaining curious without hunting for absolutes. A humble heart creates space amidst the tightness of rigid agendas. A humble heart knows that service is not really a way to feel better about oneself, and  that lack of service is simply an inability to relate.

If you don’t want to help others at all, then ask yourself if you feel a connection to others. Help is not always necessary, but it is highly unusual that no one needs you at all. A humble heart explores who and how to serve – not as a heat-seeking missile, but poised as grace.

3. Ask: Am I always/usually right? Being always right is scarcely the opposite of being wrong.  The tendency to take ownership of knowledge and information closes off connections and learning. 

There is nothing wrong with being right. However, how we carry and share insight makes all the difference.

Being always right can take on a life of its own and guarantees no innocence. It is more constructive to appreciate another’s presence and remain open-ended. 

4. Ask: Am I responsible for all my thoughts, words, and actions? 

Some may channel other beings and hide behind the messages they receive. However, a message is far from its execution, and we are the ones following through. We are responsible, and our actions carry consequences. 

A humble heart never passes the buck, but strives to understand ramifications. No entity or person, regardless how powerful, can take away our free will unless we give it away and then justify it to ourselves. We hold the contract between ourselves and the infinite, and only we can sign it.

5. Ask: Am I willing to hear feedback from the world without defending, deflecting, or shutting down? Do I need to control life’s input as I grow? Do I know the difference between feedback and an attack?

Most tend to receive feedback best when it doesn’t jeopardize their identity. However, if someone challenges an identity, niceness and sweetness turn to fangs. 

A humble heart waits to learn more about how it is both received and perceived, and heeds the signals of clinging onto something false.

The messenger may deliver the message poorly, but a humble heart can still receive the message – despite the presentation and without the need to control how life unfolds.

No Monopolies On Truth

What if we define truth as authentic being inspired by direct immersion in the infinite (divine, God, etc.) while fully expressing through the finite?

When I had my first hint that life was more than tasks, distractions, and responsibilities, I read many books about “truth.” At that time, I imagined truth to be a set of facts about life, verifiable by experience. I dutifully cross-checked my facts in search of universal ideas resonating across cultures. I followed the prescribed practices.  

This approach fit well with my overemphasis on using the mind to make sense of life. The mind had served me well up to that point, so I started my search for truth with what I most valued about myself. I was a dedicated “fact-checker” and a student of inconsistencies across ideas – and I loved my ability.

My teacher often flagged my overuse of the mind as a limitation. This insight bothered me tremendously because the mind was all I knew and I had a hard time stepping into pure awareness. 

When I had my first breakthrough, it became clear that thought and emotion were only extentions of a filtered perception. After seeing the mind and emotions for what they were, it was obvious that I was neither my thoughts nor my emotions. However, I still believed that truth was a kind of word dogma, distilled to guide life.

After the second transformation, when I began to identify with an awarenesss that watched the world arise moment to moment, I realized that I could not easily describe this way of life. It was far easier to just live and continue to surrender to what was living me. I saw hints of what my life had become in poems and art, but not in prescriptive words.

After the third transformation when “I” dissolved and there was no need to identify with anything, I was no longer sure what truth was – except happiness and bliss.  My life is still full of tasks and responsibilities, but – paradoxically – there is no one doing them while all of “me” is fully engaged.  Truth began to look more like direct awareness than something factual or prescriptive. Truth took on the form of living without a “middle-man.” With the mind quiet, there was no longer a sountrack to my life. With the emotions separated from identity, there was no need to ever stop feeling happy amidst life’s apparent ups and downs – or, to block feeling anything at all. So, truth became just living without filters.

However, truth is different to me from what I consider to be true….

Do most people identify with a filtered perception of life (ego)? Yes. Does this filtered perception cause most people to be unhappy, angry, frustrated, sad, ambitious, self-loathing, dominating, submissive, destructive, clingy,  irresponsible? Yes. Does this filtered perception cause some to claim to be “chosen,” special, gifted, privileged, or on a “divine mission”? Sure. Does any of this matter in the big scheme of things? Not really.

Breaking through the chains of perception is perhaps the toughest thing anyone will ever try to do. The chains are custom-fit to our unique makeup to avoid detection. That is why it is so difficult to break free – just when we think we have a handle on what we must do, the ego adapts and justifies yet another self-absorbed belief or action. I am grateful to my teacher for continuously catching me in a blind spot and resetting me to see the illusion trap. Without such continuous feedback from an awake being, it is very difficult to keep from deluding oneself. 

Many have not had the experience of being caught in an egoic act by clear and direct insight, and yet the result of accepting such confrontation is a series of (temporary) moments when one knows who they are not. Eventually, realization is permanent. Until then, the ego fights – the closer one gets to freedom, the harder the ego fights to maintain its lock on one’s worldview. The ego is a habit – it is neither good nor evil – but is does tend to present a very limited view of self, life, and others, while also serving its primary purpose of grounding us into physical life.

I have encountered many powerful and gifted beings who are, nevertheless, trapped in illusion and remain blind to egoic hold on them. Unfortunately, power is not always wisdom and rarely of the humble kind. Because of their accumulated power, their ego is even stronger. They pay lip service to being free, but the way they handle even the gentlest confrontation makes their bind all too clear. Claiming “martyrdom” and “sacrifice” – a death while still living is a sure sign of an ego lurking. It – the ego – is just as pleased to assert itself in the negative as the positive. Allowing “adoring, docile fans” to sing praises unchecked and looking for blind affirmers of “divine visions,” refusing other feedback and learning – check. Luring others in by promising them “immortality” – also check. 

“You are angry because you see your reflection”, meaning “I have transcended all and simply reflect you” is now a cliche, unfortunately. Many say this, but not all are true to the claim. Be careful and search your soul. Ask for clarity. Do walk away from anyone who is enthralled with merely shifting responsibility without truly having the ability to “mirror.” “You don’t see me for who I am” is another statement that needs to be carefully evaluated from a professed spiritual leader. While that may be true for true teachers, others just toss the phrase around to take power from people – perhaps even unknowingly.

Any “teachers” who fail to treat their students as equals and refuse to share in the mutual learning are simply a dominating force and possible false prophets. They are transparent and predictable, and eventually their following will disband. Of course, such teachers will justify the outcome without taking responsibility.

Any “teachers” who speak of humanity with disgust or as “tarnished souls” while claiming trying to save it raise their own red flag. An egoless being can only Love – that much is just true and shared by all religions. Yes, the ego-ridden human race generates issues, but acknowledging this is different than demeaning the very beings one wishes to help.

Some have said to me: “I am in the 5th dimension- which dimension are you?” I remember thinking If you claim to live in an advanced dimension, why do you need to ask me? Why does it matter? 

Also, there are beings and various entities claiming to help the human race. But are they free from illusion? Do they carry their own form of being trapped? What does their ego look like? Just because an entity claims advanced evolution, is that really so? If you have to deny yourself to serve another, it is unlikely you are on the path to freedom. While some channeled information is clean of agenda, other is not. Many take all channelings at face value, with reverence, and no questions asked – why? How does this cultivate our breaking through and becoming who we are? People give away their power and hide behind some “higher entity,” saying “I was told…” or “I was asked to do …”. How is this about our evolution? Taking responsibility? Honoring our union with the source without a gatekeeper? Channeling can be like a drug, as one is intoxicated with the energy of those from other dimensions. Do not fall prey to the power coursing through your veins if it is not yours. 

When you truly have broken free from the ego, you have no need to control, orchestrate, demean, condescend, patronize, attack, deflect, defend, claim righteousness, or blame. If you do these things, regardless of how skillfully or politely, you are still stuck and, probably, feeding on some sense of superior knowledge or sense of power. Those who either seek or inadvertently find power are in the most difficult position because they fear that they have more to lose and do wear a cloak of enough wisdom to fool many.

Non-truth appears to be ubiquitous and  normal. We must all go through it and come out on the other side. There is a monopoly on illusion and – so what? Let’s keep it real…it is what it is. However, truth appears to be very ordinary in every way – just living without blinders or filters. Such living seems to still be rare. However, once it occurs, there is no mistaking it. Furthermore, as the learning continues, there is a kind of fail safe put in place that continuously questions oneself and does not assume being right. Only after much introspection does one determine the path of least illusion – the opposite of blindly following some playbook and defending a position (no matter how righteous the justifications).

Once authentic being inspired by direct immersion in the infinite becomes the norm, all facts fall away and living takes priority. Service becomes natural. Creativity overflows. Time stops, but never happiness. I imagine such living would take a unique form for each of us. There is not likely to be a monopoly on such truth, and no facts, dogmas, or quests to save the entire world.

More and more, I feel like the world will continue to evolve one genuine interaction at a time – by touching one life at a time and giving freely to those who yearn for freedom. It seems so simple. So free of pomp and fanfare.

Ask yourself – why do most true Masters remain hidden in plain sight? Maybe because evolution cannot be rushed or forced. Maybe because we need to live and learn. And maybe because they wait for the right moments to help us release ourselves from our chains and realize that we never ever fell short of anything at all.

A Life of Transformation and Enlightenment