I Live You Too

A friend texted me. We had a brief exchange about our classrooms – I had recently tried incorporating a few minutes for reflection into my classes by students on Costa’s Habits of Mind. My colleague was going to try this too. She signed off with “You know I love you. Right?!” I typed “I live you too.

It was a typo. But then the light tugged at me. I live you too. The light lives all of us. When the Identity is the light, I live you too and you live me.

This phrase struck me as Being itself interacting with Itself through all of us. Conscious relationship at this level is an incredibly powerful synergy.

After the ego mechanism untangles from identity – and ego is just a mechanism or process – the expression runs crystal clear as the light expresses itself through form. Expression of the light is not clear right away – it takes about a decade to get to that after the initial, stable opening.

I live you too.

The light is not an idea. It is living. It enters through the crown of the head and one can feel the pressure of it pouring in. We open to it, and it can enter – poised at the gateway until we are ready.

As it pours in, there is blissful restfulness and the Mind goes empty in a dynamic stillness. The top of the head feels “blown off.” One no longer feels that “I” is the thoughts, emotions, and the body sensations. It may take years to integrate this throughout the entire body, when even the body dissolves in the light.

I am not describing a fleeting experience – it is a permanent change felt throughout the body. Even further transformation may occur – the entry is just the beginning.

When the circuitry is ready, it just plugs in. Getting ready means being aware of what circuitry is blocking the entry. It is unusual and rare for human beings to transform on their own.

The cost of transformation is usually a requirement to change one’s life ways – food, job, relationships, and activities – although much of this work is better done prior to transformation. Life should align with the natural flow of one’s being as much as possible. If life is not congruent with our yearning to express, things just won’t work and changes are necessary.

After the shift stabilizes, touching life is so very different. It’s like seeing the world for the first time and with a new “eye.” I still remember that feeling vividly – the initial entry, where I was and what I was doing. I was riding in a car and looking at treetops.

I fixed the “typo” and signed off with my friend. I love you too.

15 thoughts on “I Live You Too”

  1. I do not know you, not as an ego being, but through reading your words, and sharing words with you through our comments to each other, I love you, and I live you, and if you will allow, I also “grok” you, as in Stranger in a Strange Land.
    Becoming one’s true self, away from ego being, is definitely a wonderful and wondrous feeling. My own experience was not quite as yours, yet similar. It was filled with a brightness of colour, amazing colours unavailable to the eye, available only to the spirit within. It was also filled with music, music unavailable to our ears. But I do not want to give others the impression that such beauty must be experienced, for this I think is an individual experience, as much as it is an experience of the collective Life. An individual will experience it however it makes sense to them. That is the incredibility of Life. We all do it our own way.

    1. I am not speaking of you or your state here, just making a general observation. Yogis wrote about many experiences of sights and sounds in the higher planes. These are the “senses” of the vehicles (bodies) we have on these planes of existence, registering information. One can have many such experiences throughout one’s lifetime, but they are not necessarily indicators of enlightenment – forging a relationship as the “light.”
      Surprisingly, the signposts for enlightenment stages are fairly consistent, as my teacher had a number of students who broke through. They are not as indivialized as one may think. Mystical experiences do change us and enrich our perspectives, and they may not help us to break free. Many have an experience, but mistake it for transformation. Yet, the signals they emit are undeniable that no transformation took place – they just had an experience, albeit a peak experience.

      1. One recurring theme about enlightenment is that it feels like a “natural” state. There is nothing fanfarish about it. It is restful, free of looping thoughts and obsessive emotions, and a complete surrender of oneself – no holding on to people, things, or points of view. After enlightenment is stabilized, the prior state seems unnatural, constricted, and limited.

      2. Yes, surely. But a teacher can probably push his/her acolytes in particular directions. Meanwhile I don’t know anything but my own experience. That is why I want to leave an experience open-ended, that is all.

        1. Oddly enough, there is never pushing. Pushing doesn’t work. Rather, a situation of tension is set up where a practitioner unfolds. While the unfolding is unique, the shifts in perception appear to have common milestones. Anyone will always have their experiences, but the overall configuration of the experiencing apparatus changes in seemingly patterned ways – milestones. My teacher called them “stages,” although their descriptions didn’t really make sense until they were backed by direct knowing. The “not-knowing” was made abundantly clear too…

          1. I went my own way after my teacher died. Over the years I saw many leave disillusioned that their experiences were not validated as being transformation. I had experiences too, some that lasted hours or days, but I was told that they weren’t representative of stable shifts. I vaguely remember how much that sucked to hear and also how many times I just wanted to quit. But somehow I didn’t. My teacher told me at one of our rare in-person meetings “she will go all the way.” I had laughed it off because it just seemed very unlikely to me… besides, I didn’t even know what that meant.
            My teacher referenced the writings of Da Free John, who wrote about “stages.” Da Free John was tagged as a “7th stage being,” Mukhtananda “5th.” Maharshi “7th.” Now, I can see that by looking at their eyes. Trungpa – 6th. The differences were not explained, but at some point, their eyes reveal them.
            One other comment was that the “guru model does not work.” It is true – having a center, an ashram, or whatever, creates dynamics that are actually counterproductive to transformation. Living and relating to everyday people in a clearer way with most of them not even knowing anything about our “spirituality” – that seems to be where the rubber meets the road. In a world where so many claim enlightenment and advanced states, it’s hard to know the real ones who’ve broken through. Thankfully, those who find each other in a student-spiritual friend relationship are rare, but when such a friendship yields visible changes, they are incontrovertible. The universe has a way of not wasting what is available. Chogyam Trungpa – someone that really impacted me with his Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism – makes the students – spiritual friend relationship more clear, at least metaphorically. He also describes the pitfalls of personal experiences in isolation.

          2. No, direct pushing does not work, but I was thinking along the lines of very gentle urging. By asking questions in a certain way influences the answers, even if there is no intention involved. So what I was trying to say was that a teacher or guru might have students who will achieve similar results just by the way he or she teaches. This is not intentional, but most likely how the teacher’s teacher taught will affect the way the teacher teaches their own students, and thus the students learn their lessons a similar way to how the teacher learned the same lessons. I am not trying yo say this is bad, but what I am trying to say if you teach people to expect certain results, such as seeing bright lights, they will look for those lights, but may never find them. They are best not knowing what to expect, and when they experience something they are open to receive it, because they have no expectations of what to look for. It is that simple, though it may sound complex!

          3. I see that many may teach this way. In my case, no such progression occurred. There was no teaching – only a deep dive into personal egoic strategies. It is not common in the world to learn this way with feedback only of “not there yet”

          4. It is important not to underestimate the relationship with the teacher on other levels. Even when there is no personal contact, the relationship is alive – that is the impetus and teacher for transformation, not a person

          5. It might not be common yet, but it will be, I hope. More people need to get there on their own, there are not enough good teachers.

          6. Resistance is s huge factor… The ego is highly resistant to giving up its position. It fights the process intensely. The teacher actually provides energy for this battle, where possible. There are teachers, but the learning is not for most at this time. The teachers approach the students when they feel their potential to break free. Otherwise, such teachers just live their lives and model what they live without undue verbiage.

          7. Good teachers, yes. But there are far too many who say one thing, but use what knowledge they have to procure, or seduce. Their egos battle for their beings, and win.
            This is why I say make friends with your ego, share yourself with it, while keeping it subjugated to your will. This is not what the Buddha taught, but his world was much different from ours. Things must change with the times.
            I like to try to keep an open mind, and an open spirit. There are about 7.2 billion humans on the earth right now, and probably at least many septillion living beings. I do not know how to count that high. How many are ready to move on from here, I do not know. But I doubt there are enough teachers. They have their own journeys to follow…

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